Tuesday, Sept. 12, 2006 9:32 pm
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I think you are a very nice person and a good mom. But you hurt me today. I debated whether or not to write this here, because I know you in real life and we got along really well... But I decided I would because this is my diary, my space to vent, to say things I might not say otherwise, and I am really angry...
After posting the lyrics to my new favorite song I got a couple of email responses...
To be expected.
Some people said hateful things, and that just rolls off my back. It doesn't bother me, because they are just random internet people being ignorant.
Then I read this:
"Hi Joni! I read your blog today. I totally respect your right to have your own beliefs. I just wanted to remind you that although you renounced Jesus in your blog and have beliefs that take you 180 degrees away from Him. He will always love you and will welcome you back to Him with open arms if you ever choose to come back to your Christian roots.
Have a great day!"
Ok....
So.
This really burns me.
It cheeses me off.
I am more pissed off about this than any hate mail I got... This is from a "friend" someone I know and respect in real life and she basically, in a nice way, dismissed my belief in my Goddess.
You can't say you respect my beliefs if you turn right around and treat them like a whim. A flight of fancy. This isn't a game.
This is my faith.
This is my religion.
This is what my family believes, this is what we are teaching our children to believe in. I've shaped my life around my Gods.
I am so sick of people thinking like this. People who treat my faith as if it isn't valid.
People who think its just a big joke.
I know she probably meant what she said in the nicest possible way, but it hurt me.
I was never a christian. I was RAISED that way, brow-beaten by a faith that expected girls to be chaste and pure, never thinking an unkind or "wrong" thought.... Expecting this of us while we were going through puberty for christ's sake!!!!! A religion that talks about hell and damnation if you don't do exactly what they say... They being the Men... While we nice little wives and daughters sit and wait to be told how to live our lives. Its hypocrisy, that's what that is.
I don't believe that, I think its a load of bullshit.
But, I would never say that to someone's face. I'd never say, "Hey, your beliefs are ridiculous, so when you come to your senses, come on over here and my Goddess will be waiting to guide you on your path."
And I feel like that is what she said to me. Whether or not she meant it that way is irrelevant.
I respect the right to choose the path that makes you happy. And I believe everyone has a right to worship in the way that works for them.
And that is why that song speaks to me...
I judge the world by my own lights and I live by my own hand;
And if you ask me where I learned to live so recklessly,
My skin, my bones, my heretic heart are my authority.
My mother was a spinner of tales, my father a dreaming man.
And I have swung on the Dragon's Tongue and danced on holy land.
I have sung the seed up out of the ground and the bird down from the tree;
My skin, my bones, my heretic heart are my authority.
Once I was found but now I'm gone away from the faithful fold
The ones who preach that holiness is to do as you are told.
Though law and scripture, priest and prayer have all instructed me,
My skin, my bones, my heretic heart are my authority.
They tell me Jesus loves me, but I think he loves in vain;
He must go unrequited, on me he has no claim.
For the man who would command me must wear the horns and let me be
My skin, my bones, my heretic heart are my authority.
So while I breathe this glorious air, an outlaw I'll remain;
My body will not be subdued and I will not be saved.
And if I cannot shout aloud, I'll sing it secretly,
My skin, my bones, my heretic heart are my authority!
Things you can only learn from movies and television...
If I see one more little winky...
Currently Reading: Hate Mail... Jeezy Creezy people... The damn blog is called "kitchenwitch" what did you expect!
Listening To: Pagan Song
To Do List: Light a candle and calm down!!!